I stop posting. Not because I stop writing, but because I had forgotten why I write. I became scared of putting a little bit of myself out there for the world to see, even if it just be one person.
I never understood blogging and statuses and posts. It seems strange to me even if the people aren’t strangers. I guess you could benefit someone’s life maybe. I am oddly private sometimes. I don’t like presenting unfinished work. Maybe that’s why I stop sharing myself to the world in writing, I am the unfinished work.
Dave Eggers mentions a metaphor for writing being like a snake shedding it’s skin. Writing feels like yoi are putting yourself out there. But really its more like shedding a layer of skin. You’ll know things about what a snake once was from the shell of skin it leaves, but not really of who the snake is now. I’m okay with that. People can look at my shed skin, I’ll just wander off going to my next journey and keep shedding as I keep growing and living God willing.
I have 23 drafts about my most intimate relationship in life. Although I sometimes hesitate to share that relationship, I don’t see a point in wasting my energy hiding those pieces of the shell that was me. I look forward to growing in a relationship with God, and anyone who wants to look at pieces of a shell from that journey is welcome.
In short, I guess I’m back at this blogging thing.